All my life I wished for bigger boobs. When I was younger and a very late bloomer in the breast department, I was teased and called "Rosebud" for my lack of development. I would look at my mom and wonder why her double D's didn't happen for me. While other girls were getting training bras and some even getting real bras I sat longingly wondered when I would have a chance to have my bra strap slapped.
Well let me be the first to say bras are not all they are cracked up to wish for, let alone something to fill them. While I do not have (had) large breasts, I do OK. Actually after having a mastectomy was the first time I thought smaller breasts would be better for two reasons
1. V necks are no longer an option with the prosthetic
2. Less taken off
As I have gotten older (and wider) my breasts have continued to grow. Most women's breasts decrease in size when they have weight loss..but oh no..oddity alert...mine have stayed the same. Which is good and bad. Over the past year I have gone through some changes (ya think?) and you would think those changes are mainly over, but no! The breast Gods have decided to play a cruel joke on me and grant me my wish of increasing my breast size. This would be great...IF I HAD TWO!!!
Unfortunately only having one real and one plastic makes things difficult when the real one decides to grow...since the plastic one stays the same. This makes for a bit of a challenge getting dressed in the morning. Right now I have one which is normal looking and one that looks like it is deflating. It is hard to believe that one nonexistent boob can cause so much of an issue. Who knew that at the young age (hey the cancer dr.s called me young) of 41 that I would be stuffing my bra with what ever I can find to even things out. I thought about getting an inflatable boob but what if it breaks? Is looking like you are lactating worse or better than a boob fart?
I always try to look for the light at the end of the tunnel. After my latest phone call to the plastic surgeon to see where I am on "the list", I discovered that THIS June or July maybe my time..whoot whoot...new boob(ies) here we come....maybe I should consider two brand new ones because my guess is that after the reconstruction they don't upgrade you for free.
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Witch Doctor Which Doctor
So I decided that I would like to try to eliminate the hot flash issue. I have been taking a very low very low dosage of a drug called effexor to help reduce them, but decided why not try the referral to "the witch doctor".
M friend K recommended her after having gone to see several professionals about her problems to which she pinpointed a sensitivity to gluten and allergy to dairy fairly quickly that others couldn't diagnose. So I decided that I had nothing to loose.
Apparently she only takes calls on Wednesday morning between 8-10am which is when I have a weekly meeting scheduled. So trying to book an appointment was challenging at best. I finally got an appointment and wrote down the directions. Now I am directionally challenged at best and given the fact it was dark at 5pm added some extra challenge to driving out to an area I had never been. I googled it a couple of times and got land marks from some people and felt good about where I was going. That is until I realized that the land marks I had could only be seen in daylight. You would think a lake would be visible...except when there are no street lights.
I finally find the street and there is only one house which I cannot find a number for so I walk up to the front of the house. Hmmm no porch light on, so I take a step closer and realize my foot is tangled on something..a dog lead....ok that could have been bad. I ring the door bell and wait. A woman answers the door..H? Yes.
She turned around and mumbled something and pointed to a room which she turned on a the light in and then mumbled something else that sounded like she was finishing dinner. So I assumed I was to wait in the lite room. I looked around to a variety of organized chaos and wondered what I had gotten myself into. After what was only a few minutes (but felt like an eternity) she came back to the room and said "ok" and turned and went down another hallway and into another room. I followed blindly. I enter a room which had a wall of pills, a massage table, two chairs and an electric stand alone fireplace. "Where should I sit?" She mumbled something so I just sat in the most comfortable chair of the two.
She was busy getting a pen and paper so I was able to get a good look at her. I place her about 55-60, about 4'9", with a bob and lots of layered clothing but looked normal. No gnarly nose or black hat in site. She asked me a variety of medical questions and was really only interested in current things as opposed to long ago issues.
She asked me to stand with my right foot and left arm out. She then gently pushed on the end of my hand.. Then she asked me to put out the opposite hand and foot; which she pushed on as well. She then looked at me and said (clearly) "Do you run into a lot of things?" ahhh ...yes. "You are out of balance"...ok? Apparently when I walk my left arm and leg want to go together as opposed to my left leg and right arm...funny I have never noticed this. So my body is trying to spin in a circle. Hmm makes sense and I have lots of bruises to show for my running into things..I just took it as me being me. (I did randomly fall down once while just standing stillish while others climbed down a hill)
She asked me to lay on her table and put her hand under my head. I closed my eyes while she gently moved her fingers around. I felt like my brain cells were swirling. She then went to my feet and pushed them down. Asked me to stand up and repeat the same procedure as before. "There" she said quite satisfied. "That's fixed"..??? all I felt was dizzy.
I laid back down on the table and she asked my to put my arms straight up with my palms facing out and my hands touching. As she put bottles of pills on my stomach I was to try to keep my hands together. Easy right? Not so much. Some pills she couldn't pull my hands apart and others, no matter how hard I tried she did it easily. By the end there was a whole trove of boxes and bottles on my stomach.
I sat up and she asked if I used canola oil? Odd question but yes I used it last night to make popcorn but use olive oil on a regular basis. She wanted me to switch to coconut oil, eat kale and take the variety of vitamins laying before me. Basically they are fish oil, magnesium, an estrogen boosting supplement and rhodilia. Ok I could do this. I paid and then got up. She made no movement from her chair. I am thinking we are done but she makes no movement.
Instead she starts patting a dog and telling me about her kenneling services. I put on my jacket and asked "What now"? Take the vitamins for a month then come back and see me. I am not to stop taking my current drug or vitamins. I then start to leave and she doesn't follow. I come across a closed dog gate which was not there before. I attempt to open it but I am not sure how it works. So I go back and ask her. She tells me about a hidden lever but stays patting the dog and makes no attempt to come help me or see me to the door. I do manage to get out and back to my car. Ok I just paid a lot of money for a whole lot of weird!
Follow up: The vitamins have reduced my hot flashes to 1-2 a day from 3-5. I have noticed my right arm swings when I move my left leg and vice versa. I am not sure if this is new or now I notice it. My husband says it is new.
I have gone back to see H one more time and have another appointment scheduled for January as she has begun working on other issues I have..chronic nasal drip. The second time was not as odd as the first time, except she answered the door in her jammies and held the boxes up to my face as opposed to my stomach but lets see how this progresses before I pass judgment as for now things seem to be working so I guess her potions are worth it!
M friend K recommended her after having gone to see several professionals about her problems to which she pinpointed a sensitivity to gluten and allergy to dairy fairly quickly that others couldn't diagnose. So I decided that I had nothing to loose.
Apparently she only takes calls on Wednesday morning between 8-10am which is when I have a weekly meeting scheduled. So trying to book an appointment was challenging at best. I finally got an appointment and wrote down the directions. Now I am directionally challenged at best and given the fact it was dark at 5pm added some extra challenge to driving out to an area I had never been. I googled it a couple of times and got land marks from some people and felt good about where I was going. That is until I realized that the land marks I had could only be seen in daylight. You would think a lake would be visible...except when there are no street lights.
I finally find the street and there is only one house which I cannot find a number for so I walk up to the front of the house. Hmmm no porch light on, so I take a step closer and realize my foot is tangled on something..a dog lead....ok that could have been bad. I ring the door bell and wait. A woman answers the door..H? Yes.
She turned around and mumbled something and pointed to a room which she turned on a the light in and then mumbled something else that sounded like she was finishing dinner. So I assumed I was to wait in the lite room. I looked around to a variety of organized chaos and wondered what I had gotten myself into. After what was only a few minutes (but felt like an eternity) she came back to the room and said "ok" and turned and went down another hallway and into another room. I followed blindly. I enter a room which had a wall of pills, a massage table, two chairs and an electric stand alone fireplace. "Where should I sit?" She mumbled something so I just sat in the most comfortable chair of the two.
She was busy getting a pen and paper so I was able to get a good look at her. I place her about 55-60, about 4'9", with a bob and lots of layered clothing but looked normal. No gnarly nose or black hat in site. She asked me a variety of medical questions and was really only interested in current things as opposed to long ago issues.
She asked me to stand with my right foot and left arm out. She then gently pushed on the end of my hand.. Then she asked me to put out the opposite hand and foot; which she pushed on as well. She then looked at me and said (clearly) "Do you run into a lot of things?" ahhh ...yes. "You are out of balance"...ok? Apparently when I walk my left arm and leg want to go together as opposed to my left leg and right arm...funny I have never noticed this. So my body is trying to spin in a circle. Hmm makes sense and I have lots of bruises to show for my running into things..I just took it as me being me. (I did randomly fall down once while just standing stillish while others climbed down a hill)
She asked me to lay on her table and put her hand under my head. I closed my eyes while she gently moved her fingers around. I felt like my brain cells were swirling. She then went to my feet and pushed them down. Asked me to stand up and repeat the same procedure as before. "There" she said quite satisfied. "That's fixed"..??? all I felt was dizzy.
I laid back down on the table and she asked my to put my arms straight up with my palms facing out and my hands touching. As she put bottles of pills on my stomach I was to try to keep my hands together. Easy right? Not so much. Some pills she couldn't pull my hands apart and others, no matter how hard I tried she did it easily. By the end there was a whole trove of boxes and bottles on my stomach.
I sat up and she asked if I used canola oil? Odd question but yes I used it last night to make popcorn but use olive oil on a regular basis. She wanted me to switch to coconut oil, eat kale and take the variety of vitamins laying before me. Basically they are fish oil, magnesium, an estrogen boosting supplement and rhodilia. Ok I could do this. I paid and then got up. She made no movement from her chair. I am thinking we are done but she makes no movement.
Instead she starts patting a dog and telling me about her kenneling services. I put on my jacket and asked "What now"? Take the vitamins for a month then come back and see me. I am not to stop taking my current drug or vitamins. I then start to leave and she doesn't follow. I come across a closed dog gate which was not there before. I attempt to open it but I am not sure how it works. So I go back and ask her. She tells me about a hidden lever but stays patting the dog and makes no attempt to come help me or see me to the door. I do manage to get out and back to my car. Ok I just paid a lot of money for a whole lot of weird!
Follow up: The vitamins have reduced my hot flashes to 1-2 a day from 3-5. I have noticed my right arm swings when I move my left leg and vice versa. I am not sure if this is new or now I notice it. My husband says it is new.
I have gone back to see H one more time and have another appointment scheduled for January as she has begun working on other issues I have..chronic nasal drip. The second time was not as odd as the first time, except she answered the door in her jammies and held the boxes up to my face as opposed to my stomach but lets see how this progresses before I pass judgment as for now things seem to be working so I guess her potions are worth it!
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Downward Dog
I have done yoga off and on over the years. Actually more off than on, but after 3 years off I decided I would try it once again. So I coaxed my friend R into going with me to a class which my friend (K)teaches. This way I have comfort all around.
I don't think R has ever been to a yoga class so I picked a class where you go in for the stretch and then hold. Your body eventually releases to the pain and relaxes. R and I have a habit of going places and breaking out in giggles to the point where we are worried about getting asked to leave..but it has never made it to this point(none that I remember anyways). I figured with K teaching the odds were in our favour.
We enter the room and everyone is getting out cushions and pads..ok I don't remember this from the description, but like good little lemmings we do the same. We roll out our mats in the opposite direction as we are at the front of the class and I need to see. The room is darkish with candles lite all around. Ahhh nap time!
We begin with a couple of moves and I learn quickly that the parking lot light and I are not in agreement. Its cascading brightness into my zen-like ways was making me want to get a large rock and bust it. ommmmm
I think I am doing pretty well and I am getting back into the rhythm of things when we have to go into a frog pose. Ok I am human...and apparently I am not meant to be a frog. After a couple goes I figure it out but feel like an idiot with my feet turned out and my butt up in the air..now this is sexy, but I am thankful no one is behind me as spandex only holds in so much...ommm. I place a bolster under me so I am able to hold the frame for 5 minutes and relax into the pose...damn f'ing light! ommmm
After five minutes we are told to slowly come back to sitting and as I begin I can hear the beginnings of the suction from my boob releasing. Normally when this happens it is a slight noise but in a silent room it came our as a flatulent excretion sound...yes it sounded like I let one rip. To my horror, I look to my left where R is trying to control her laughter, but once we make eye contact all control is lost. I am trying to point to my boob to explain but her shaking shoulders tell me that she is gone. We can no longer look at each other for fear of giggles erupting more.
We finish the class by relaxing on out back and I have now started thinking about the many ways to smash the light...ommmm...but then I realize I am lost on the purpose of the class...ahhh to hell with that..my concentration was lost at the boob fart. Damn FROG!
I don't think R has ever been to a yoga class so I picked a class where you go in for the stretch and then hold. Your body eventually releases to the pain and relaxes. R and I have a habit of going places and breaking out in giggles to the point where we are worried about getting asked to leave..but it has never made it to this point(none that I remember anyways). I figured with K teaching the odds were in our favour.
We enter the room and everyone is getting out cushions and pads..ok I don't remember this from the description, but like good little lemmings we do the same. We roll out our mats in the opposite direction as we are at the front of the class and I need to see. The room is darkish with candles lite all around. Ahhh nap time!
We begin with a couple of moves and I learn quickly that the parking lot light and I are not in agreement. Its cascading brightness into my zen-like ways was making me want to get a large rock and bust it. ommmmm
I think I am doing pretty well and I am getting back into the rhythm of things when we have to go into a frog pose. Ok I am human...and apparently I am not meant to be a frog. After a couple goes I figure it out but feel like an idiot with my feet turned out and my butt up in the air..now this is sexy, but I am thankful no one is behind me as spandex only holds in so much...ommm. I place a bolster under me so I am able to hold the frame for 5 minutes and relax into the pose...damn f'ing light! ommmm
After five minutes we are told to slowly come back to sitting and as I begin I can hear the beginnings of the suction from my boob releasing. Normally when this happens it is a slight noise but in a silent room it came our as a flatulent excretion sound...yes it sounded like I let one rip. To my horror, I look to my left where R is trying to control her laughter, but once we make eye contact all control is lost. I am trying to point to my boob to explain but her shaking shoulders tell me that she is gone. We can no longer look at each other for fear of giggles erupting more.
We finish the class by relaxing on out back and I have now started thinking about the many ways to smash the light...ommmm...but then I realize I am lost on the purpose of the class...ahhh to hell with that..my concentration was lost at the boob fart. Damn FROG!
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
Nip and Tuck
So I am on the track of semi-stalking my plastic surgeon to be. Lucky him. I found out about an information session on what is known as BRA day or Breast Reconstruction Awareness where my plastic surgeon along with two others would be speaking. People from all over called and emailed me to tell me about the seminar to the point where I almost updated my facebook status to "I KNOW", but then those people would have to be on facebook.
B was working that night, so off I went in the blustering cold to find the seminar room in the hospital. I am sad at best with directions so I called B to ensure I was on the right path and after confirming with him, asking information and walking the 100 steps to the room I found my way(and a washroom along the way). I got my sense of direction from my dad:)
I filled out a ballot after seeing others ahead do the same (lemming alert!) and found a seat not too close to the front but not too far back either. It was the Goldilocks of seats. I looked around and noticed that no one else was there alone. I had other people who would have come with me but I thought "This is information only, I don't have to make my decision today". There were woman and partners, woman and friends and woman who I think were on a "Girls night out"...some people need to get out more. As well as woman old, young and some in obvious stages of cancer.
The session began with a woman who had gone through surgery 7 years ago...who now looked about 12...and she introduced the Doctors and explained some housekeeping rules, she mentioned the ballots and the food. FOOD??? How did I miss that part. Oh well, my grumbling tummy would have to wait, and there would only be two doctors speaking today as one was unable to attend. <Please don't let it be mine.> If I am planning to stalk someone I should at least know what they look like. Small technicality.
The session was quite informative and I learnt that each surgeon has different ways they operate both in the operating room as well as with their administrative staff. My guy was there ...phew..and he doesn't call you until it is getting time to work out a plan and operate. There are also 4 types of surgeries...these are by no means the proper descriptions but it is my take on them.
1. Pump it up- They stick an inflatable implant in and every month inflate your skin by filling the implant with saline each month until you reach the desired size.
Timeline: 3 months to inflate, 1 simple surgery for breast implant and 1 for nipple
2. Fun Bags- Implant surgery..as seen all over Hollywood. Saline and a new silicone option available
Timeline: 1-2hours of surgery for breast(s) 2nd surgery for nipple
3. TRAM flap (ouch 1)- If you have had radiation this is option 1. They take a section of your back, fling it still attached and slap it on your front.(Gives you the basic idea). Do some microsurgery, hope it takes and bam..new boob. Apparently looks life like and an implant and fat injections are likely needed unless you are an A
Timeline: 3-4 hours for surgery 1 and 1 hour for surgery 2 (nipple)
4. DIEP Flap- This is a tummy tuck and boob job in one. Lots of microsurgery involved in joining blood vessels. It is the most risky as it doesn't always take and it usually takes 10-12 hours!!!!! and then they still have to do the nipple. This is option number 2 for apres radiation...and probably the one I will venture in to, but we will see.
I felt well informed after the session and realized my wait was probably still 1.5 years away due to limited operating room time lines as reconstruction after cancer for breast health is not considered a priority. I would like to oppose this view and believe we all need to start writing letters to the appropriate people to get this changed. I guess my stalking will have to change direction...I am so fickle.
At the end they drew for prizes...remember the ballot? And go figure, I won a compression bra..well that will come in handy 1.5 years from now.
And where does the nipple come from? The cut the skin into a Olympic podium looking pattern and then pull it together and voila...one nipple!
B was working that night, so off I went in the blustering cold to find the seminar room in the hospital. I am sad at best with directions so I called B to ensure I was on the right path and after confirming with him, asking information and walking the 100 steps to the room I found my way(and a washroom along the way). I got my sense of direction from my dad:)
I filled out a ballot after seeing others ahead do the same (lemming alert!) and found a seat not too close to the front but not too far back either. It was the Goldilocks of seats. I looked around and noticed that no one else was there alone. I had other people who would have come with me but I thought "This is information only, I don't have to make my decision today". There were woman and partners, woman and friends and woman who I think were on a "Girls night out"...some people need to get out more. As well as woman old, young and some in obvious stages of cancer.
The session began with a woman who had gone through surgery 7 years ago...who now looked about 12...and she introduced the Doctors and explained some housekeeping rules, she mentioned the ballots and the food. FOOD??? How did I miss that part. Oh well, my grumbling tummy would have to wait, and there would only be two doctors speaking today as one was unable to attend. <Please don't let it be mine.> If I am planning to stalk someone I should at least know what they look like. Small technicality.
The session was quite informative and I learnt that each surgeon has different ways they operate both in the operating room as well as with their administrative staff. My guy was there ...phew..and he doesn't call you until it is getting time to work out a plan and operate. There are also 4 types of surgeries...these are by no means the proper descriptions but it is my take on them.
1. Pump it up- They stick an inflatable implant in and every month inflate your skin by filling the implant with saline each month until you reach the desired size.
Timeline: 3 months to inflate, 1 simple surgery for breast implant and 1 for nipple
2. Fun Bags- Implant surgery..as seen all over Hollywood. Saline and a new silicone option available
Timeline: 1-2hours of surgery for breast(s) 2nd surgery for nipple
3. TRAM flap (ouch 1)- If you have had radiation this is option 1. They take a section of your back, fling it still attached and slap it on your front.(Gives you the basic idea). Do some microsurgery, hope it takes and bam..new boob. Apparently looks life like and an implant and fat injections are likely needed unless you are an A
Timeline: 3-4 hours for surgery 1 and 1 hour for surgery 2 (nipple)
4. DIEP Flap- This is a tummy tuck and boob job in one. Lots of microsurgery involved in joining blood vessels. It is the most risky as it doesn't always take and it usually takes 10-12 hours!!!!! and then they still have to do the nipple. This is option number 2 for apres radiation...and probably the one I will venture in to, but we will see.
I felt well informed after the session and realized my wait was probably still 1.5 years away due to limited operating room time lines as reconstruction after cancer for breast health is not considered a priority. I would like to oppose this view and believe we all need to start writing letters to the appropriate people to get this changed. I guess my stalking will have to change direction...I am so fickle.
At the end they drew for prizes...remember the ballot? And go figure, I won a compression bra..well that will come in handy 1.5 years from now.
And where does the nipple come from? The cut the skin into a Olympic podium looking pattern and then pull it together and voila...one nipple!
Sunday, October 14, 2012
Dressing Up
So in the past three weeks I have attended three events. The first one was business dress, so I was all good. The second one was a wedding where I scoured stores for a dress that was under $200 and worked with all of my requirements <sleeve, no v neck..and fits> but instead ended up borrowing a dress. The third event was dressy and I had limited warning to attend so ..no time to shop. I had to figure out something from my closet...while driving home!
I decided on a dress that I thought could work with a tank top and a sweater I would be fine. I called up the friend I have with the most clothing and luckily she thought she had a sweater which would would work. Check 1.
I rushed home, having 40 minutes to get ready. I located the dress and a tank top. I decided that instead of worrying about my boob and possible shifting I would glue it on. Apply glue and wait..while waiting I find a pair of pantyhose which I am hoping doesn't have a run in them.
Put on boob, hmm bra or no bra. No bra
Put on tank top and then dress. The dress has a band around the middle which has caused me some issues in zipping it up before...and did again today..grr. Look in the mirror..oh oh I need a bra as I have one boob up and one boob down. Locate strapless bra. Attempt to shove it down through dress and tank top and do it up. Half way through the attempt I realize the bra is too small.
Take out bra, take off dress and tank top. Locate slip with built in bra..check time..urgh I have already used up 30 minutes. Husband calls and is on the way home...hurray up I need help dressing. Silence. I think he is debating missing this experience.
Put on slip. Put on tank top. Partially zip up dress to problem area. Shove dress on. Squeeze in fake boob and roll the dress over the real one. Attempt the zip up. By this time I have discovered I missed my calling as a contortionist.
Finally get the zipper up. Friend arrives. Damn. 40 minutes and I have a dress on. Put on pantyhose and realize these must have been invented by men. Thrown on some make up and then OMG my hair. Tame Afro and find purse and try to match shoes. Husband arrives home. Out the door. <1.2hrs later.> I have straps going every which way and reallllly hope the sweater I am about to borrow covers it all up. Sigh...it does. We arrive to the event. GET ME A DRINK!
Half way through the night my feet are hurting, should have wore the other ones and my boob feels like it is trying to come off my body. When I finally get home and fling my shoes off across the room I realize that the slip has under wire, which has popped out and is trying to lift the glue and my boob apart. OUCH!
I like dressing up and going out but I am not sure that after 3 events, all having the same chicken if I wouldn't be better off at home eating nachos, drinking beer and lounging in sweats. To be determined....
I decided on a dress that I thought could work with a tank top and a sweater I would be fine. I called up the friend I have with the most clothing and luckily she thought she had a sweater which would would work. Check 1.
I rushed home, having 40 minutes to get ready. I located the dress and a tank top. I decided that instead of worrying about my boob and possible shifting I would glue it on. Apply glue and wait..while waiting I find a pair of pantyhose which I am hoping doesn't have a run in them.
Put on boob, hmm bra or no bra. No bra
Put on tank top and then dress. The dress has a band around the middle which has caused me some issues in zipping it up before...and did again today..grr. Look in the mirror..oh oh I need a bra as I have one boob up and one boob down. Locate strapless bra. Attempt to shove it down through dress and tank top and do it up. Half way through the attempt I realize the bra is too small.
Take out bra, take off dress and tank top. Locate slip with built in bra..check time..urgh I have already used up 30 minutes. Husband calls and is on the way home...hurray up I need help dressing. Silence. I think he is debating missing this experience.
Put on slip. Put on tank top. Partially zip up dress to problem area. Shove dress on. Squeeze in fake boob and roll the dress over the real one. Attempt the zip up. By this time I have discovered I missed my calling as a contortionist.
Finally get the zipper up. Friend arrives. Damn. 40 minutes and I have a dress on. Put on pantyhose and realize these must have been invented by men. Thrown on some make up and then OMG my hair. Tame Afro and find purse and try to match shoes. Husband arrives home. Out the door. <1.2hrs later.> I have straps going every which way and reallllly hope the sweater I am about to borrow covers it all up. Sigh...it does. We arrive to the event. GET ME A DRINK!
Half way through the night my feet are hurting, should have wore the other ones and my boob feels like it is trying to come off my body. When I finally get home and fling my shoes off across the room I realize that the slip has under wire, which has popped out and is trying to lift the glue and my boob apart. OUCH!
I like dressing up and going out but I am not sure that after 3 events, all having the same chicken if I wouldn't be better off at home eating nachos, drinking beer and lounging in sweats. To be determined....
Sunday, September 16, 2012
What's in a Doctor
Let's face it, I have seen a lot of Doctors, Nurses and Technicians over the past year and it is amazing how different they all are. From bedside care through to pain management.
Until I went to University I had the same family doctor, which my parents still have. He went above and beyond and you never felt rushed in his office, which might also explain the long waits in the waiting rooms. I have actually been through several doctors since then as they have either gone on to specialize in something else or just plain moved to a different city.
I have been lucky for the most part ..until now... I have Dr. B. The one who couldn't tell me I had cancer. While people are curious as to why I don't dump him, I stay because he is out of a medical clinic and being a patient of the medical clinic allows you direct links to their specialists. While I prefer not to pit Dr against Dr, I will give you two scenarios and you can decide.
Scenario 1
I had been dreading going to see my family doctor, Dr. B as I hadn't seen him since the day he "kind of" told me I had cancer. I have two cysts on my foot which have been there since before this whole story began, but they are now bothering my walking so it is time to go see about them.
I call and make the appointment and the lovely receptionist knows my name and books me right in. I show up 5 mins early and low and behold he is on time and I go right into a waiting room. I look at the computer screen which says my name and : Last Date of visit July 22, 2011...D day in my books.
I quickly take a picture of this ...like I will ever forget it...then I wait...and wait....and wait. I do some texting and play on the Internet of my smart phone and continue to wait. I hear him in the room beside me and think..not much longer now. Then I hear the receptionist go into his office and say | Have you seen JJ yet..silence. Another 5 minutes go by and then he comes in, goes to the computer and brings up my chart. I take a look and the first line in bold letters is |BREAST CANCER MASS|
He turns to me and says, what can I do for you. I tell him about the cysts and he asks to see my foot, feels around and says...
Dr B: Who told you they were cysts
Me: No one, but they are round balls
Dr B: They might not be cysts, they might be a ganglion
Me: -I am thinking...are they not called ganglion cysts
He tells me that there is someone else here who he will refer me to..yeah...a referral. Get me out of here. He types in new notes asks if there is anything else and then his cell phone rings in his office and he is up and out. No...it`s been a year..how are you feeling...no bye...no nothing
Scenario Two
Off to have the results of my mammogram from my surgeon. Since I hadn`t been pushed up in appointments and I didn`t feel any different I assumed all was good. We go to the appointment and check in and are lead down to the room by a very funny East Indian lady and out into a waiting room..johnny shirt on, ties in the front.
I am changed for all of 5 minutes and the current resident of Dr. Ts comes in. Does and examination and asks
Resident: Do you have any pain
Me: just phantom ones
Resident: Do you have any nipple discharge
Me: ahh I don`t have a nipple
Resident;- laughter- I meant on the other one
Me: nope
Resident: Your mammogram was clean, but Dr. T will still want to see you
In walks Dr. T
Handshakes all around, remembers my husbands profession and jokes around while examining me, asks me about my prosthetic and whether it is bothering me and we talk about best ways to get to see a plastic surgeon faster. Says that everything looks good but he has a questions
Me: What
Dr. T: pokes me and say..not for you ,..shsh..for your husband...lots of laughter all around
Dr. T helps me sit up and tells me he will see me in a year after my next mammogram.
So there you go. All I hope is that my family doctor decides to move on to another city and I get someone who will at least read my chart prior to entering the room instead of forgetting me in the waiting room. Also, I have not heard about the referral yet and will propably have to call to ensure he put it in...sigh, what a difference a doctor can make.
Until I went to University I had the same family doctor, which my parents still have. He went above and beyond and you never felt rushed in his office, which might also explain the long waits in the waiting rooms. I have actually been through several doctors since then as they have either gone on to specialize in something else or just plain moved to a different city.
I have been lucky for the most part ..until now... I have Dr. B. The one who couldn't tell me I had cancer. While people are curious as to why I don't dump him, I stay because he is out of a medical clinic and being a patient of the medical clinic allows you direct links to their specialists. While I prefer not to pit Dr against Dr, I will give you two scenarios and you can decide.
Scenario 1
I had been dreading going to see my family doctor, Dr. B as I hadn't seen him since the day he "kind of" told me I had cancer. I have two cysts on my foot which have been there since before this whole story began, but they are now bothering my walking so it is time to go see about them.
I call and make the appointment and the lovely receptionist knows my name and books me right in. I show up 5 mins early and low and behold he is on time and I go right into a waiting room. I look at the computer screen which says my name and : Last Date of visit July 22, 2011...D day in my books.
I quickly take a picture of this ...like I will ever forget it...then I wait...and wait....and wait. I do some texting and play on the Internet of my smart phone and continue to wait. I hear him in the room beside me and think..not much longer now. Then I hear the receptionist go into his office and say | Have you seen JJ yet..silence. Another 5 minutes go by and then he comes in, goes to the computer and brings up my chart. I take a look and the first line in bold letters is |BREAST CANCER MASS|
He turns to me and says, what can I do for you. I tell him about the cysts and he asks to see my foot, feels around and says...
Dr B: Who told you they were cysts
Me: No one, but they are round balls
Dr B: They might not be cysts, they might be a ganglion
Me: -I am thinking...are they not called ganglion cysts
He tells me that there is someone else here who he will refer me to..yeah...a referral. Get me out of here. He types in new notes asks if there is anything else and then his cell phone rings in his office and he is up and out. No...it`s been a year..how are you feeling...no bye...no nothing
Scenario Two
Off to have the results of my mammogram from my surgeon. Since I hadn`t been pushed up in appointments and I didn`t feel any different I assumed all was good. We go to the appointment and check in and are lead down to the room by a very funny East Indian lady and out into a waiting room..johnny shirt on, ties in the front.
I am changed for all of 5 minutes and the current resident of Dr. Ts comes in. Does and examination and asks
Resident: Do you have any pain
Me: just phantom ones
Resident: Do you have any nipple discharge
Me: ahh I don`t have a nipple
Resident;- laughter- I meant on the other one
Me: nope
Resident: Your mammogram was clean, but Dr. T will still want to see you
In walks Dr. T
Handshakes all around, remembers my husbands profession and jokes around while examining me, asks me about my prosthetic and whether it is bothering me and we talk about best ways to get to see a plastic surgeon faster. Says that everything looks good but he has a questions
Me: What
Dr. T: pokes me and say..not for you ,..shsh..for your husband...lots of laughter all around
Dr. T helps me sit up and tells me he will see me in a year after my next mammogram.
So there you go. All I hope is that my family doctor decides to move on to another city and I get someone who will at least read my chart prior to entering the room instead of forgetting me in the waiting room. Also, I have not heard about the referral yet and will propably have to call to ensure he put it in...sigh, what a difference a doctor can make.
Friday, September 7, 2012
Grow old with me
5 years ago I said "I do". I was one of those late bloomers who wanted to test the waters of the dating pool before jumping in to catch my fish. My mother got to the point that unless they made it to the 6 week mark she didn't want to know their name. It was really simple in my books, I wanted a guy like my dad. I had to date a lot of Mr. Wrongs to find one Mr. Right.
The first time B met my parents was the morning after we had celebrated his birthday. I had made lobster linguine and we went out on the town with his friends. He woke up the next morning and asked "What time will your parents be here" ...buzz..."ahh about NOW". So not only was he hung over but he went through the social graces of meeting my parents and watching my mother choose his leftover dinner for lunch<which I think he wanted to take home...and has never let me forget> .
I woke up one day 6 years later and decided that I was too old to call B my boyfriend anymore and it was time we got married. 6 months later B asked me to marry him<he is not one to cave under pressure>. I don't have a romantic proposal story but it is "us"
Christmas Eve lying in bed watching Spiderman. When the uncle gets shot, B turns to me and says
B: what are you doing in June?
Me: June? How do I know...that is 6 months away
B: Want to get married then
Me; No I don't want to get married in June, it's rainy..wait are you asking me to marry you?
B: yes
Me: I would rather September <I like to work out details before committing>
B: September would be fine too
Me: Then yes
B: Produces a homemade ring///which I still have/// but he later replaced it with the real version
Me: Ok then
Then we go back to watching the movie.....
So after 12 years together and 5 years of marriage our life ..for the most part ..has been easy. We have been through a lot in those past 12 years
- Death of friends and family
- Inability to have children
- Cancer with my mom, dad, cat and me
- Divorces and remarriages of family and friends
- Remodeling ..which can me more taxing on a marriage than any of the above
- Loss of a job
- Going back to school
-etc.
But through it all we have had lots of laughter, lots of tears and best of all.. lots of love. I never thought that when I took the vow of for better or worse that we would truly be tested to the limits on both ends.
Each time when I say good night I realize how lucky I am to have B in my life and as each day goes by it really does get better and better. I am glad I waited to marry my best friend and as we grow old and more aches and pains come along I am glad he is there to rub my feet and not want to throw me off a cliff...now that's love!
The first time B met my parents was the morning after we had celebrated his birthday. I had made lobster linguine and we went out on the town with his friends. He woke up the next morning and asked "What time will your parents be here" ...buzz..."ahh about NOW". So not only was he hung over but he went through the social graces of meeting my parents and watching my mother choose his leftover dinner for lunch<which I think he wanted to take home...and has never let me forget> .
I woke up one day 6 years later and decided that I was too old to call B my boyfriend anymore and it was time we got married. 6 months later B asked me to marry him<he is not one to cave under pressure>. I don't have a romantic proposal story but it is "us"
Christmas Eve lying in bed watching Spiderman. When the uncle gets shot, B turns to me and says
B: what are you doing in June?
Me: June? How do I know...that is 6 months away
B: Want to get married then
Me; No I don't want to get married in June, it's rainy..wait are you asking me to marry you?
B: yes
Me: I would rather September <I like to work out details before committing>
B: September would be fine too
Me: Then yes
B: Produces a homemade ring///which I still have/// but he later replaced it with the real version
Me: Ok then
Then we go back to watching the movie.....
So after 12 years together and 5 years of marriage our life ..for the most part ..has been easy. We have been through a lot in those past 12 years
- Death of friends and family
- Inability to have children
- Cancer with my mom, dad, cat and me
- Divorces and remarriages of family and friends
- Remodeling ..which can me more taxing on a marriage than any of the above
- Loss of a job
- Going back to school
-etc.
But through it all we have had lots of laughter, lots of tears and best of all.. lots of love. I never thought that when I took the vow of for better or worse that we would truly be tested to the limits on both ends.
Each time when I say good night I realize how lucky I am to have B in my life and as each day goes by it really does get better and better. I am glad I waited to marry my best friend and as we grow old and more aches and pains come along I am glad he is there to rub my feet and not want to throw me off a cliff...now that's love!
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