Downward Dog

I have done yoga off and on over the years. Actually more off than on, but after 3 years off I decided I would try it once again. So I coaxed my friend R into going with me to a class which my friend (K)teaches. This way I have comfort all around.

I don't think R has ever been to a yoga class so I picked a class where you go in for the stretch and then hold. Your body eventually releases to the pain and relaxes. R and I have a habit of going places and breaking out in giggles to the point where we are worried about getting asked to leave..but it has never made it to this point(none that I remember anyways). I figured with K teaching the odds were in our favour.

We enter the room and everyone is getting out cushions and pads..ok I don't remember this from the description, but like good little lemmings we do the same. We roll out our mats in the opposite direction as we are at the front of the class and I need to see. The room is darkish with candles lite all around. Ahhh nap time!

We begin with a couple of moves and I learn quickly that the parking lot light and I are not in agreement. Its cascading brightness into my zen-like ways was making me want to get a large rock and bust it. ommmmm

I think I am doing pretty well and I am getting back into the rhythm of things when we have to go into a frog pose. Ok I am human...and apparently I am not meant to be a frog. After a couple goes I figure it out but feel like an idiot with my feet turned out and my butt up in the air..now this is sexy, but I am thankful no one is behind me as spandex only holds in so much...ommm. I place a bolster under me so I am able to hold the frame for 5 minutes and relax into the pose...damn f'ing light! ommmm

After five minutes we are told to slowly come back to sitting and as I begin I can hear the beginnings of the suction from my boob releasing. Normally when this happens it is a slight noise but in a silent room it came our as a flatulent excretion sound...yes it sounded like I let one rip. To my horror, I look to my left where R is trying to control her laughter, but once we make eye contact all control is lost. I am trying to point to my boob to explain but her shaking shoulders tell me that she is gone. We can no longer look at each other for fear of giggles erupting more.

We finish the class by relaxing on out back and I have now started thinking about the many ways to smash the light...ommmm...but then I realize I am lost on the purpose of the class...ahhh to hell with that..my concentration was lost at the boob fart. Damn FROG!